Books for Belize

The whole office went to a nice long lunch today to California Pizza Kitchen on our visiting boss's tab. Usually, we only get to communicate with him via phone and e-mail, since he is a part of our parent publishing company in the Midwest. His visits always herald a group outing to lunch, his treat.

This time I got the opportunity to tell him about my mission trip to Belize. We were talking about air travel in general and packing for trips to such climes, when I told him that the reason our group is so large is because we are bringing donated items with us; that it is prohibitively expensive to ship donated items to Belize. When asked what types of donated items we are bringing, I told him school supplies, vitamins, books--He asked whether the school might like our company to donate some books! I said, of course! We began discussing what the students might like to read that we have in our inventory. Quite possibly books about our natural parks, barn variety books, and books on commemorative gardens and memorial parks might be interesting to Belizean children. We even have a bilingual English-Spanish book about a canyon in Mexico.

He told me that it wouldn't take very many books until my bag would weigh too much to check in without a fee, and so he would be happy to have the publishing company send a box of requested titles straight to Belize. The cost, he said, would not matter.

I am so happy right now!! I will have to find out where it can be shipped!

Pricking the Surface

Last night, I went to give blood at the Red Cross donation center. I balked a little at the initial pinprick (a finger prick to test my blood) and the nurse sympathized. I get a pinprick every week, she told me, and I'm always scared to do it; it always hurts! My prick hurt, but not as bad as I thought it would.

When it came time to give blood, my veins looked dubious, so first they tried the left crook of my elbow. The vein "rolled" and they fished around under my skin for a while, trying to pierce the vein. It was uncomfortable, until finally, I felt a sharp pain, and suddenly an awful burning (the iodine, they speculated). Tears sprang into my eyes and, alarmed, they pulled out the needle. Did I want to try the other arm, they asked? Yes, I whimpered. I came here to give blood, so I ought to try anything to give it! I got in the other chair now, squirming and gritting my teeth and gripping my stress ball, they successfully tapped the vein in my right arm. It hurt terribly. Three different nurses checked in on me, patted my arm, brought me juice. They don't want me to be traumatized enough to stop donating.

As I sat draining, an older woman came in. She had sassy knee-high boots, her gray hair cut in a smooth bob, and a sort of manuscript which she flopped open and on which she began highlighting passages. They slipped the needle in without any response from her. (She said she'd given blood about fifty times.) The nurses good-heartedly teased me about this being the proper way to react to a needle. Well, the joke is on her. I got TWO Emeril oven gloves.

It appears very easy for someone who has been writing all her life to sit down and prick the surface without a struggle, letting the words come pouring out and juggling other responsibilities at the same time (like the sassy donor). For others, even though she writes on a regular basis, pricking the surface triggers fear and is a struggle every time (like the testing nurse), but she at least does it.

For me, sometimes I sit to write and I get that arm where I am searching for blood, but I can't get into that vein. It hurts, and I am scared to move the needle to try and find it. (Hey, at least in writing, there aren't three women in white jackets hovering over me.) But if I am tenacious enough, I will just try the other arm. Stop floundering around one topic and move on to another starting point. It will probably hurt every time, but at least I will be saving up to three lives--I mean, writing words that the world will hopefully read one day.

Give blood, make an appointment to donate!

Short Game (Cross Posted)

This is cross posted at www.hrwritersguild.com.

If we liken our status as writers to football, then I have just suited up. Somewhat of a college player, I have been out of the game for a while, only recently drafted in by Coach Cindy. I’ve taken a few good runs at the sleigh but now I am ready for the real thing. That doesn’t mean I am entirely confident.

That’s why Coach’s observation that writing is a long drive (as a team) toward an eventual touchdown (by an individual) rings true. Being part of this team means that when I fumble, the rest of the group huddles together and all is not lost. To score, step one is making goals–the crucial step two is sharing them. It doesn’t do me any good to think up a play on my own and take off, hoping that it works out. The rest of the team has to be in the know.

Therefore, in no particular order, here are ten of my goals for 2010:

• Figure out if my book will need to become two, or even three books
• Write at least every other day–try for ten pages a week at first
• Blog about my progress (even regress–then the group can help)
• Don’t stop and revise so much, so often
• Don’t get shy and avoid explaining my book when I’m asked about it
• Decide my target audience and keep them in mind
• Read more fantasy fiction (I’m on that one already–Karen Miller’s Godspeaker trilogy)
• Don’t guilt myself so hard for not getting it perfect the first time–just write my way there
• Decide on a new title
• Create an outline–this will help move the plot and avoid fluff that doesn’t advance it

Looking at these, I figure that at least SEVEN of these can be worked toward in the next two weeks! Which is amazing. Having several achievable short-term goals can really be a confidence-booster. Hopefully the new coach of the Washington Redskins will learn from the previous year and realize this winning strategy, too!

Happy New Year!

I didn't begin 2010 with a new outlook on life or a list of resolutions right away. I didn't look at the changing of calendars as a big turning of a leaf. But now, on the eighth of the month, I see where having that mindset is so crucial. It is really simple to ease into a state of mind where things just roll along and you kind of roll along with it. When I had about a year left in my master's program, I made a list of goals--some far-off or very hard to attain--and I put it on my wall. It was a long time before I was able to cross some of those off, but I did, and it really helped to have it up there for me to see every day.

I think it is time for a new list. This is something I don't want to throw together just because I talk about it on a blog post. It has to be well thought-out and serious. I want to choose good solid short-term goals and challenging long-term ones to keep me focused on the future. I want to put goals up that scare me. Just rolling along with the current of life is not who I am, and it's not what I want to become.

A few weeks ago, I had a guest over who I hadn't seen since before I was doing my thesis. She smiled and asked when I was applying for the PhD. Now I have already posted about why the PhD is not a part of my near-future plans, but it still gave me a real jolt. When I was at my uni, that's all I heard from my friends and professors, and just their confidence in me and the high bar set by their expectations really kept me moving, kept me looking up and reaching. So when she asked me about the PhD again, after so many months of not thinking about it, I realized that I was not looking up and reaching anymore.

Tonight I have a meeting about what my personal writing goals are and I have written up a few. I hope that this first meeting of the year will be a kick in the pants not only for me, but for the whole group, because who doesn't need a kick in the pants sometimes? (Or, as my old writing teacher put it, a fire lit under the ass.) After that, I will come home and really reconsider what I want out of my future and make a new list of goals to put on my wall.

Updates

Hello everyone!

I can't let the month go with only one post, even if the post has some negative mixed in with the positive. I think that when I do not accomplish what I set out to do, I delay posting a new update because I don't like to tell myself (and anyone reading) that I am not doing what I set out to do; which is, mainly, writing my novel.

There IS some AMAZING news: I have made above and beyond what my goal was to fundraise for the trip to Belize!! At the last moment, I had to raise about $170, and so I planned a Pampered Chef fundraiser show, which raised $213. Then, I received a $200 donation, and a $20 donation completely by surprise. AND, one of the sums I thought I had to pay back ($180 in flyer miles transfer fees to a miles donor) was actually taken care of by someone else. So, I am very happy to say that the scholarship money offered to me by the church can be a smaller amount, if I need it at all! I have to do some math.

The bad news is that I have been working way too hard on this book synopsis for the author whose novel I edited for pay a while back. I already did an About the Author, and it's taking so long to do this synopsis. I guess I just don't have a real solid idea of how to go about it, and what is expected of me. I have asked several times, but I still don't have a real good idea of what the publisher wants to see in terms of a synopsis.

Until I finish that synopsis, which ought to be today, THEN I can start writing my fiction. And it is not good that it's taken me so long on the synopsis, since I have to do some major rewrites and submit AT LEAST by late Sunday, January 3. Our meeting is on Friday, January 8 and I want to be sure everyone has enough time to print it out and work on it. That only gives me a three-day weekend, really, to write a good amount for a group critique to take place; and I assume much of Friday (I have the day off) will be spent recovering and cleaning, since we are throwing a party at our house.

Nevertheless, this is all possible, and I suppose it's good to state these goals here on the blog--it gives me SOME accountability and increases the chance that I will listen to myself and accomplish these deadlines.

Close to Belize Fundraising Goals!

Wow! I have been working so hard--and it's paying off. I only need $169.85 more to reach the $882 I need to go to Belize! It has been such hard work (and still more to do). I have so far sold food at four church services and delivered food to friends and family who want to help. I have carefully calculated what my mom and I spend on ingredients and food containers, spent hours (sometimes till one in the morning) cooking and baking to make sure food is fresh, reimbursed the money spent to create the food, and sold the food. Sometimes, the margin of profit is depressingly small, but now, as I look at my financial spreadsheet, it has worked in a shorter time than I thought possible! I am so heartened at how close I am.

I couldn't have done all of this without my mom. She's planned the "menus" with me, shopped for ingredients with me, showed me where to get cheap quality containers, and stayed up late with me cooking, baking, testing, and doing dishes. Sometimes it was all we could do not to bite each others' heads off, but so far, so good!

The downside is that I have hardly had time to write. I have participated in the fiction critique group, and I have realized what a huge booster it is going to be for me, but right now I feel mired in freelance writing, guilt over not writing my own stuff, stress over the holidays, and preparation for all this Belize fundraising. I need to be proactive in portioning my time, but for now, I don't predict that the skies will clear for my own writing for another few weeks at least. I need to get some deadlines out of the way.

Fundraising and Fiction

When all is said and done, I have only managed to raise $159.32 for Belize so far. That is because although through food sales and donations I have made $657.22, a whole $300 of that was a donation from the church itself (they called it a "scholarship") and a whopping $197.90 was spent in groceries (food ingredients and storage containers).

On the bright side, I am averaging a $70 profit at each food sale at church, and I am beginning to take outside orders. I also have most of the ingredients right now that I will need for the next major food sale this Sunday, which will net around another $70 without having to reimburse for groceries. I also have 9 more Sundays to go until the trip--Sundays being the biggest days for selling food.

No one has taken me up on my offer to babysit, which I am sort of grateful for because although I would be a great babysitter, I would rather not spend a whole night watching children (augh). But I would do it for Belize. All those late nights I stayed up baking or cooking (especially cooking alone, since I hate to do that) I kept thinking of Belize. I also know that people have been so generous and will continue to make purchases to help me out.

Last night, one purchaser wanted a $9 quart of soup and $4 bag of peanut brittle delivered way out of my way. I packed it up and added two more soups I hoped to up-sell. When I got there, he not only bought the product but said he was going to give me another $20 anyway. So it just proves that you ought to go out of your way, even when the outcome is uncertain--great things will come of it!

As for my writing, it is getting hard to keep up with my other responsibilities as I bake and cook all this fundraiser food. I have to write a 500-word synopsis and author's bio for a publisher that my street lit author wanted done by tomorrow, but will give me an extension. I have to also critique a 120-page draft of writing for the critique group. It meets Friday and there is no time to submit anything of my own.

But perhaps this delay is for the best. I have reconsidered how my book will start out, and it has massive implications for the future of the plot and characterization of the leading lady. This came about through the advice of the critique group. Since I have developed the habit of thinking thoroughly before writing (which may or may not be the best way to go about it--probably the latter), I feel more inclined to think out my changes before trying to implement them. Once I get done with my author's needs and do the critique group this Friday, I will recenter on my own writing.